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As far as the first problem goes, parenting coordinators must be appointed by the parents' agreement or by a court order. If there is no agreement on who to appoint, it will be necessary to make an application to the court and have the court decide who to appoint.
For the second problem, you may simply have to do some more shopping around. It may help to shift some of the burden to your ex. After suggesting your own list of two or three people, ask your ex for his or her their list. Try to pick one that you can both agree on.
==For more information==