When a child begins to form a preference for one parent over the other, the first sign that this might become a problem often occurs when the child begins to express a reluctance to spend time with the other parent. It's important to distinguish a simple reluctance, that might be appropriate for the child's age and stage of development or result from age-appropriate separation anxiety, from a more serious problem like estrangement or alienation. It's also important to distinguish between a reluctance that stems from the child's own feelings toward a parent and a reluctance that is encouraged by a parentencourages.