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Separation can also see changes in the roles played by parents. A parent who hasn't been particularly involved with the children may become more involved; a parent who used to be very involved may step back a bit. This can be challenging for some parents, and what needs to be kept in mind is that children need all of the adults in their lives to do their best. A parent becoming more involved is almost always something that is good for children. What harms children is conflict, conflict in both intact and separated families. On the other hand, sometimes stepping back, at least for a little while, can reduce conflict.
While this may sound a little preachy, the fact is that no matter how adults are able to rationalize the consequences of the end of their relationship, their children can't. Your job, regardless of your emotional and legal entanglements with each the otherparent, is to protect your children from your conflict as much as possible, and to develop parenting arrangements that will be in the best interests of your children.
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